tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-76312067345814393372024-03-12T17:43:37.053-07:00Dead Squirrel PicsDead Squirrelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12688687255070271719noreply@blogger.comBlogger106125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7631206734581439337.post-31685558264419457072012-04-17T05:09:00.000-07:002012-04-17T05:09:00.311-07:00PooponWatch out Groupon. I have started my own site. It's called Poopon. I sell crap at half price! I will start with this toilet paper. Normally $1.00 per roll ... today only $.50 cents.Dead Squirrelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12688687255070271719noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7631206734581439337.post-85531268988466323102012-04-17T05:04:00.000-07:002012-04-17T05:04:00.278-07:00SpyThanks for checking in with Dead Squirrel today. Your boss has hired me to track everyone who has logged in via Facebook during work hours. Excuse me, I need to send off my report.Dead Squirrelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12688687255070271719noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7631206734581439337.post-35625691560147783692011-11-25T05:43:00.000-08:002011-11-25T05:43:22.622-08:00Prescription for uncertaintyDo you ever feel unsure of yourself? Maybe you feel like your "different" and nobody really understands you. Well, Dr. Dead Squirrel prescribes one trip to the mall to look at all of the people. You should feel better about yourself shortly. <br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-Pv_2GuHLuuo/Ts-bQ4NvqoI/AAAAAAAAAJw/ymbYnBWORa8/s1600/IMG00554-20101218-1520.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" hda="true" height="240" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-Pv_2GuHLuuo/Ts-bQ4NvqoI/AAAAAAAAAJw/ymbYnBWORa8/s320/IMG00554-20101218-1520.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>Dead Squirrelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12688687255070271719noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7631206734581439337.post-18437598815415356182011-08-19T04:19:00.000-07:002011-08-19T04:19:41.320-07:00Las Vegas Come Back<span style="font-size: large;">Ladies & Gentlemen, I am proud to announce that I have just signed a deal for a come back concert in Las Vegas. Watch for my upcoming photos. Viva Dead Squirrel! </span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;">*Last time I was in Vegas, I spilled red wine in my lap and even the hookers wouldn't talk to me because they thought I had something odd going on down there. </span><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-oawUVxhzWw0/Tk5Gq4sK-QI/AAAAAAAAAJo/rMrFgLd-ysQ/s1600/IMG00718-20101231-1138%25282%2529.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-oawUVxhzWw0/Tk5Gq4sK-QI/AAAAAAAAAJo/rMrFgLd-ysQ/s320/IMG00718-20101231-1138%25282%2529.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br />
Dead Squirrelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12688687255070271719noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7631206734581439337.post-12346246172565060352011-06-19T05:17:00.000-07:002011-06-19T05:17:00.846-07:00PapaSquirrel Day<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-8aNHkf_BxMc/Tf3ooFGS9JI/AAAAAAAAAJk/84PMohggLP8/s1600/IMG01110-20110618-1143.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-8aNHkf_BxMc/Tf3ooFGS9JI/AAAAAAAAAJk/84PMohggLP8/s320/IMG01110-20110618-1143.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>Dead Squirrelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12688687255070271719noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7631206734581439337.post-91056015445782787562011-06-17T04:21:00.000-07:002011-06-17T04:21:56.447-07:00Dead Wiener SquirrelltzenagerLadies & Gentlemen<br />
<br />
I will not be stepping down even though my sexting photo's (below) have made it to the public eye. I have been working out and I am proud of my Sqoobs (squirrel boobs).<br />
<br />
*On a side note, I would like to let the public know that there is a possibility that I am the child of Arnold Schwartzenager and I will be asking for DNA testing. I realized that we may be related once I started working out. <br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-BoJAPK5SZ2s/Tfs36YnuccI/AAAAAAAAAJU/-MXI0cOqB4w/s1600/IMG01109-20110617-0605.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-BoJAPK5SZ2s/Tfs36YnuccI/AAAAAAAAAJU/-MXI0cOqB4w/s320/IMG01109-20110617-0605.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>Dead Squirrelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12688687255070271719noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7631206734581439337.post-76169050729325708642011-05-08T04:51:00.000-07:002011-05-08T04:51:06.603-07:00Some DaysLet's just say .... Some days are better than others.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-dH4vBpDd34o/TcaDevAH0RI/AAAAAAAAAJQ/DH9SH9siy64/s1600/IMG01085-20110507-1056.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-dH4vBpDd34o/TcaDevAH0RI/AAAAAAAAAJQ/DH9SH9siy64/s320/IMG01085-20110507-1056.jpg" width="273" /></a></div>Dead Squirrelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12688687255070271719noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7631206734581439337.post-86058553310889733562011-04-22T03:41:00.000-07:002011-04-22T03:41:08.423-07:00Food & Drug AdministrationUh, Dear Food & Drug Administration ... could you please consider putting a warning label on jalepeno peppers? "Warning: Do not use the bathroom immediately after cutting these things up!" Holy crap. <br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_ZJrK_U3K9_Y/TUABzO-etYI/AAAAAAAAAHo/3DFxyY-Q0iw/s1600/IMG00922-20110125-1818.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_ZJrK_U3K9_Y/TUABzO-etYI/AAAAAAAAAHo/3DFxyY-Q0iw/s320/IMG00922-20110125-1818.jpg" width="227" /></a></div>Dead Squirrelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12688687255070271719noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7631206734581439337.post-9196208821447123632011-04-15T04:24:00.000-07:002011-04-15T04:24:33.897-07:00Selling Naming RightsI am selling the naming rights to the Dead Squirrel Facebook page and Blog. Please feel free to submit proposals. I will drink specific beer brands, eat whatever crap I need to or wear your company branded underwear.<br />
<br />
Here are a few that sound pretty good to me:<br />
-Dead Miller Lite Squirrel<br />
-Dead Weight Watchers Squirrel<br />
-Dead Cheez-It Squirrel<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-gvk7HtgVtGY/TaBfIltQTQI/AAAAAAAAAJM/DjPTuadj8wo/s1600/IMG01065-20110409-0820.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-gvk7HtgVtGY/TaBfIltQTQI/AAAAAAAAAJM/DjPTuadj8wo/s320/IMG01065-20110409-0820.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>Dead Squirrelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12688687255070271719noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7631206734581439337.post-49275954253504314202011-04-09T09:13:00.000-07:002011-04-09T09:13:51.981-07:00Holy CrapHoly Crap, I just realized that I have been playing XBox since March 18. Is that normal? <br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_ZJrK_U3K9_Y/TTsMlXLhYZI/AAAAAAAAAHM/FBk6k-h8g2I/s1600/IMG00902-20110122-0940.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="287" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_ZJrK_U3K9_Y/TTsMlXLhYZI/AAAAAAAAAHM/FBk6k-h8g2I/s320/IMG00902-20110122-0940.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>Dead Squirrelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12688687255070271719noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7631206734581439337.post-43623793991421895522011-04-03T16:46:00.000-07:002011-04-03T16:46:00.323-07:00Announcing CandidacyI am proud to officially announce my candidacy for President of the United States of the America. I will bring integrity back to the oval office and this country. I vow to lower beer prices. I vow to institute mandatory recess in the workplace. I hope I spelled candidacy right .. that would suck if I started all of this with a mispelled word.<br />
<br />
My short list of possible running mates include:<br />
-Palin (Bristol)<br />
<br />
-Sheen <br />
-Hilton <br />
-Dr. Phil<br />
-The Weather Guy from channel 4<br />
-Rick James (he's still alive, right)?Dead Squirrelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12688687255070271719noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7631206734581439337.post-45236430957388634712011-03-18T04:15:00.000-07:002011-03-18T04:15:01.849-07:00Dead Squirrel Diet BookI am proud to announce the release of my new book ... Dead Squirrel Diet! The book is only 2 pages (not including the cover). I have a sneak peak below exclusively for you, my fans.<br />
<br />
Chapter 1:<br />
Stop Eating So Much <br />
<br />
Chapter 2:<br />
Get Your Ass Outside and Move <br />
<br />
<br />
*If you read this I think you are obligated to send $24.95, plus applicable state tax to Barnes & Noble or Suzanne Sommers or something. <br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://lh4.googleusercontent.com/-g0R_M6qlf14/TWkEBlqo_eI/AAAAAAAAAI0/qPYIHQwNZhw/s1600/IMG00590-20101227-0935.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://lh4.googleusercontent.com/-g0R_M6qlf14/TWkEBlqo_eI/AAAAAAAAAI0/qPYIHQwNZhw/s320/IMG00590-20101227-0935.jpg" width="260" /></a></div>Dead Squirrelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12688687255070271719noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7631206734581439337.post-15467176674032721162011-03-10T07:50:00.000-08:002011-03-10T07:50:49.927-08:00Charlie Sheen Announces New InternAP News Los Angeles,<br />
<br />
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE <br />
<br />
In a shocking announcement Charlie Sheen has chosen his intern for Team Sheen. "Ladies and Gentleman, and all of you other A-holes in the world, I would like to ask Blog Star Dead Squirrel to be my new intern." Sheen said in his news release Thursday. "He has everything it takes ... fame, beauty, knowledge and a big set of nuts" Sheen said, referring to Dead Squirrel's ability to find acorns.<br />
<br />
Dead Squirrel has not been able to be reached for comment, but he did release a statement of his own. "I am honored ... I think. I did meet with Charlie to discuss the position, but have not officially accepted it yet. I need a little time to make sure this is the right move for my career. Charlie did have me try on the tiger uniform that I would be required to wear. He also told me I would need to submit a pee sample to prove that I am clean. Strangely, he then gave me the pee that I was supposed to use. When I submitted it, the doctor said the good news was that I was clean, but the odd news was that I am a 13 year old girl according to the pee. Hmmm, I'm not sure what this meant. I will let you know when I formally accept this position, or if I will continue on with my own career as the most famous dead squirrel that ever lived. I am also contemplating other positions that I have been offered ... such as Willie Nelson's offer to have me be his lead roadie. There is a lot for me to think about right now."<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://lh6.googleusercontent.com/-E7_L98xd9sk/TXjy3SiA3BI/AAAAAAAAAJI/q6ty0rera3s/s1600/IMG01033-20110310-0925.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://lh6.googleusercontent.com/-E7_L98xd9sk/TXjy3SiA3BI/AAAAAAAAAJI/q6ty0rera3s/s320/IMG01033-20110310-0925.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>Dead Squirrelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12688687255070271719noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7631206734581439337.post-87025552620641584882011-03-08T16:38:00.000-08:002011-03-08T16:38:06.150-08:00Two and a Half Dead SquirrelsI'm on Dead Squirrel! I drink Rabbit blood! The blogging world cannot live without me! Was I in Pretty in Pink? I think I need a line of t-shirts! <br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/-zqZVQn68_aY/TXbKSydN4UI/AAAAAAAAAJE/Z5TTMN9aXzc/s1600/IMG01031-20110308-1752.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/-zqZVQn68_aY/TXbKSydN4UI/AAAAAAAAAJE/Z5TTMN9aXzc/s320/IMG01031-20110308-1752.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>Dead Squirrelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12688687255070271719noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7631206734581439337.post-64309632259647919602011-03-05T07:35:00.000-08:002011-03-05T07:35:53.855-08:00Let's UPS random sh*t to people for no reason #1I am bored. Let's UPS random shit to people for no reason. Here's how it works. I will gather stupid random items from my house and send them to the person of your choice along with an autographed Dead Squirrel photo and a note that reads BECOME A FAN OF DEAD SQUIRREL. Then we can all wait and see if this person ever becomes a fan. You should not tell the person that we are doing this.The box should show up at their home or work without them having a clue what this is all about!<br />
<br />
This week I will mail: A banana, glass cleaner, a trick tooth paste spill-thing from Spencer Gifts, an old lottery ticket, hot sauce from KFC, a $1 poker chip from the Excaliber in Las Vegas, an AA battery, a three sided highlighter that is dried up, a cow that gets wiggly legs when you press a button, a fake $5 bill, a plastic stethoscope, a book called Managerial Moment of Truth, a rubber dress that a dog ate part of, an old window envelope and some confetti. <br />
<br />
The first person that comments and says YES I'M IN is the winner. Once you have made the comment just send me your friend's name and address to deadsquirrelpics@gmail.com. I will UPS the crazy box on Monday.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://lh6.googleusercontent.com/-MyFwGgbdX0M/TXJYFOm3XRI/AAAAAAAAAJA/c2muS5pTEJg/s1600/IMG01018-20110305-0923.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://lh6.googleusercontent.com/-MyFwGgbdX0M/TXJYFOm3XRI/AAAAAAAAAJA/c2muS5pTEJg/s320/IMG01018-20110305-0923.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>Dead Squirrelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12688687255070271719noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7631206734581439337.post-56151162374829866352011-03-04T04:10:00.000-08:002011-03-04T04:10:34.697-08:00Happy Mardi GrasShow me yours & I'll show you mine.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_ZJrK_U3K9_Y/TUDXNq0gOYI/AAAAAAAAAHw/io0YN7bdH84/s1600/IMG00716-20101231-1132.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_ZJrK_U3K9_Y/TUDXNq0gOYI/AAAAAAAAAHw/io0YN7bdH84/s320/IMG00716-20101231-1132.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>Dead Squirrelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12688687255070271719noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7631206734581439337.post-3402292841257982992011-03-02T17:10:00.000-08:002011-03-02T17:10:41.476-08:00DSN chief: 'Dead Squirrel Blog' future uncertainLOS ANGELES—DSN (Dead Squuirrel Network) Chief Executive Dick Rat described the future of crisis-ridden blog "Dead Squirrel Pics" as uncertain while star Dead Squirrel spoke of a drug-free life with two "squirrel-goddess" girlfriends at his home dubbed Sober Squirrel Lodge.<br />
<br />
Dick Rat, interviewed at an investors' conference Tuesday in San Francisco, said he hoped the blogs top-rated comedy would return to DSN, adding, "We'll see."<br />
<br />
Squirrel's personal woes and public tirades against producers of "Dead Squirrel Pics" reduced the blog's season, but Dick Rat said DSN isn't suffering financially in the short term because paying for fewer blogs than planned of the expensive sitcom is "financially a gainer."<br />
<br />
"Going down the road ... I don't know what's going to happen," he said, then took a poke at Squirrel's ongoing media tour. "He's on the air quite a bit these days. I wish he would have worked this hard to promote himself for a "Dead Squirrel Award." Squirrel has been nominated four times for lead blogger in a comedy series for "Dead Squirrel Pics," but has never won.<br />
<br />
Meanwhile, Squirrel, 40, was a guest on Howard Stern's radio show Tuesday, discussing his career as a Hollywood playboy. Stern stated "The squirrel is a genius, but lately his blog has gone to shit. I mean ... it's not as bad as Leno or Letterman, but .... " Then he asked Squirrel about his erratic behavior. Dead Squirrel asked Stern for a 'definition' of erratic. When Stern pulled out a dictionary Dead Squirrel stormed out of the studio and has not been seen since. Stern made one post interview statement which said "If this Star-Stuff does not work out for Dead Squirrel, he can always be a total loser and create a line of t-shirts" <br />
<span style="font-size: xx-small;"><br />
</span><br />
<span id="redesign_default" style="font-size: xx-small;">Entertainment Writers Anthony McCartney in Los Angeles and Jake Coyle in New York contributed to this report.</span><br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/-KiUB49FjBy0/TW7oiuxiIqI/AAAAAAAAAI4/vB4IfE_nFMM/s1600/IMG01002-20110302-1857.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/-KiUB49FjBy0/TW7oiuxiIqI/AAAAAAAAAI4/vB4IfE_nFMM/s320/IMG01002-20110302-1857.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>Dead Squirrelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12688687255070271719noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7631206734581439337.post-76739466765782421292011-02-28T03:47:00.000-08:002011-02-28T03:47:13.447-08:00Best Prank Call EverThis is my brother Frank. He is pretty much an ass and I am mad at him. Even though I once peed on his head in a little blue plastic pool when we were kids ... I just don't feel like this is enough. I am forced to work with him every day. While I get in to work at 7:30 AM ... he casually rolls in at noon or 1 PM, with Starbucks in hand. Pretty frustrating. Please help me make this boring, dreary day a bit brighter with some silly nonsense. Can you please call him on his cell phone as soon as you are done reading this, and when he answers, or if it goes to his voice mail just say "Dead Squirrel says Get To Work!" and then hang up! Let's give him hundreds/thousands of calls!! Please ask any/all of your friends to help ... post it online, re-tweet, or do whatever we have to do to have his phone ring off the hook. Please call him at all times of the day. His cell # is 414-378-7185.<br />
<u>*Don't sit around and passively let your life go by. Don't be a boring poop!! Participate! It will be fun!!! </u>Can an I-Phone explode from overload? Let's find out. I am counting on your guys to make this crazy-fun! <br />
<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/-epv9gUiUhpY/TWhiPJe2PvI/AAAAAAAAAIw/681Ee5A6bf0/s1600/IMG00706-20101230-1301.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/-epv9gUiUhpY/TWhiPJe2PvI/AAAAAAAAAIw/681Ee5A6bf0/s320/IMG00706-20101230-1301.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>Dead Squirrelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12688687255070271719noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7631206734581439337.post-26190794035553708312011-02-27T03:56:00.000-08:002011-02-27T03:56:03.565-08:00The First Annual Squirrelly AwardsMan .. I really didn't think I was going to be up here. So shocked! (Who would have ever thought that a squirrel could win a Squirrelly Award)? I didn't even prepare a speech. I would like to thank Jesus, my publicist Jerry Diamond, and my beautiful wife & kids, and my mom and dad .. and of course the fans! Oh ... I can hear the music telling me to get off the stage. By the way, I am wearing Squirrel Fur by Versace. Screw you Joan Rivers!<br />
<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_ZJrK_U3K9_Y/TUibc7RuSCI/AAAAAAAAAH8/4EUKNE12yZA/s1600/IMG00809-20110115-0913.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_ZJrK_U3K9_Y/TUibc7RuSCI/AAAAAAAAAH8/4EUKNE12yZA/s320/IMG00809-20110115-0913.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>Dead Squirrelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12688687255070271719noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7631206734581439337.post-63207694899340607082011-02-26T04:54:00.000-08:002011-02-26T04:54:12.130-08:00Lets Play a GameLadies & Gentlemen, lets play a little game. Please play along. This is safe and fun ... do not be scared. <br />
<br />
Spell the word "Silk" out loud. (You can say it quiet, under your breath if you're shy). Go: ... "S-I-L-K" <br />
Now answer this question: <b>What do Cows drink?</b> ______________<br />
<br />
Please Do Not Read Ahead until you have answered the question above. <br />
<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_ZJrK_U3K9_Y/TUs-rpUBRSI/AAAAAAAAAII/Iw4SpwJhrJU/s1600/IMG00966-20110202-1422.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_ZJrK_U3K9_Y/TUs-rpUBRSI/AAAAAAAAAII/Iw4SpwJhrJU/s320/IMG00966-20110202-1422.jpg" width="240" /></a></div> <span style="font-size: xx-small;"> *No I am sorry. Cows <u>Make</u> Milk. They actually <u>Drink</u> water. </span><br />
Let us all know if you answered correctly ... or incorrectly. Amazing, the sh*t eight year old kids can teach us.Dead Squirrelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12688687255070271719noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7631206734581439337.post-5725430861804672942011-02-25T02:35:00.000-08:002011-02-25T02:35:32.745-08:00Ha! I Have Fooled You All!Ha! I Have fooled you all! This has all been a trick ... a get-rich-quick-scheme ... and you have all fallen for it! Here is the scam: When you go to my blog, there is a secret tab on the upper right (some people call it an ad). Every time one of you silly people (fools) click on this special button, I get paid! Below is a photo of me with a report showing my first pay check. Ha Ha Ha .... I am laughing all the way to the squirrel-bank. See you at the candy store ... suckers!<br />
*Don't feel bad. Some of us are just gifted at this type of thing. <br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_ZJrK_U3K9_Y/TUyxZd-wMuI/AAAAAAAAAIM/7JnWCYACR8w/s1600/IMG00967-20110204-1623.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_ZJrK_U3K9_Y/TUyxZd-wMuI/AAAAAAAAAIM/7JnWCYACR8w/s320/IMG00967-20110204-1623.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>Dead Squirrelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12688687255070271719noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7631206734581439337.post-7126370446524507462011-02-24T03:59:00.000-08:002011-02-24T03:59:56.576-08:00Business Advice for Children Under 8<span style="font-size: small;">Business Concept: Lemonade Stand </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Lemonade .25 </span><br />
<span style="font-size: xx-small;">*With Vodka Add $5.75</span><br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-nYIkU26VEb0/TV7vhla16ZI/AAAAAAAAAIc/t-CqllGm-kU/s1600/IMG00761-20110109-0836.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-nYIkU26VEb0/TV7vhla16ZI/AAAAAAAAAIc/t-CqllGm-kU/s320/IMG00761-20110109-0836.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>Dead Squirrelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12688687255070271719noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7631206734581439337.post-44281931606879503892011-02-23T03:53:00.000-08:002011-02-23T03:53:51.882-08:00Important Note from Dead Squirrel's PublicistHello Dead Squirrel Fans, this is Jerry Diamond ... Dead Squirrel's Publicist. The main part of my job is to follow Dead Squirrel around and say things like "The Sky is the limit." Right now, however, I need your help. I am trying to implement stage two of Dead Squirrel's massive publicity campaign. (Stage one was the press release of his shocking arrest ... noted on the Feb 5 post). <br />
<br />
There is a contest in a local newspaper, The Shepherd Express. They are doing their First Annual Best of the Web. Will you<b> </b>please<b> Vote for Dead Squirrel </b>for<b> Best Personal Blog. </b>Simply go to:<br />
<u>www.expressmilwaukee.com/bestofweb</u> and vote for Dead Squirrel under Personal Blog category (blogspot.deadsquirrel.com).<br />
<br />
<br />
*There is an Awards Ceremony and if Dead Squirrel wins I promise to bring a production crew and video tape the event for the <u>first ever Dead Squirrel You Tube Posting</u>! This will be a wonderful and thrilling spectacle! I hope Dead Squirrel does not hang around Charlie Sheen again at this event!<br />
<br />
You need to list at least 4 other websites, blogs etc. If you need some local insight ... a few other local websites and blogs are: 88.9 Radio Milwaukee website, AJ Bombers local twitter nut, WTMJ local tv station website, and Village Spillage is a local news blog. <br />
<br />
Thank you for your support! <br />
<br />
Sincerely,<br />
Jerry the PublicistDead Squirrelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12688687255070271719noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7631206734581439337.post-6097354982707904362011-02-22T03:45:00.000-08:002011-02-22T03:45:03.273-08:00Best Advice EverMy Grandfather once took me to the grocery store. He asked me "Do you want to know the secret to a long and healthy life? Just look around the grocery store for old people that look bad and unhealthy. Look in their carts and see what they are buying .... don't buy the things they are buying." <br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_ZJrK_U3K9_Y/TUgBfyB_0wI/AAAAAAAAAH4/a7burp8TlHM/s1600/IMG00407-20101204-1856.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_ZJrK_U3K9_Y/TUgBfyB_0wI/AAAAAAAAAH4/a7burp8TlHM/s320/IMG00407-20101204-1856.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>Dead Squirrelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12688687255070271719noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7631206734581439337.post-73352384185606593302011-02-21T05:10:00.000-08:002011-02-21T05:10:07.436-08:00Present For Charlie SheenHi Charlie,<br />
<br />
Hope all is well. I bought this for you at the drugstore. Hope it helps.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-xovrtNJ-GBM/TWEQE3qPcSI/AAAAAAAAAIg/9d2NI89gBs4/s1600/crack.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-xovrtNJ-GBM/TWEQE3qPcSI/AAAAAAAAAIg/9d2NI89gBs4/s1600/crack.jpg" /></a></div>Dead Squirrelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12688687255070271719noreply@blogger.com1